Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
