My hair reeks of homosexuality.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
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