She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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