Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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