I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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