I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
