STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Randomize
