god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
its not stalking. its research.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
