K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
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