I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Randomize
