we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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