Where is the hickey?
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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