Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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