I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
