What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
