We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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