youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Randomize
