I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
