we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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