I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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