so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
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