My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
