So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
