Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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