): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I currently don't understand fingers.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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