do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
