3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
