We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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