OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
