ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Randomize
