I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
