Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
