Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
