Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
