We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
