saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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