You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
