at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
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