coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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