just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
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