Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
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