i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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