I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
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