u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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