i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
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