You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize