only if we run a train.
done.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
