If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
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