margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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