Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
